worried

Well today we find out what the doctor says about Dustin's knee. I can't believe in two hours i'll know what our life holds. This doctor holds our future in his hands. I don't know what to think. I'm nervous about what he's going to say that my stomach is just in knots. Well i'll update tonight letting you know what he says. Thanks for reading, if anyone does.

frustration and venting

Well I've come to the conclusion that my life just is different than anyone elses. If something bad can happen, its always targeted at me. I don't know why-but i really wish it would quit.

The only positive things in life are truly the most important factors right now in my life. My husband, my son and my family and work family. They are my strength. My husband is my rock. No matter the day I am having, he always makes it better when I hear his voice or see his face when I walk in from a long days work. He reminds me that everything is going to be okay and that with every passing day he loves me more and more. My son, Ty, he is only 6 months old but I swear he could light up a whole room if he could with that smile. His personality reminds me a lot of the man he was named after, Ty Moosman. Ty was killed in a MVA Sept 28th of last year at the young age of 21. he was Dustin's best friend and cousin. They were inseperable. He was the type that always had a smile on his face and nothing could ever be bad enough to ruin his day. I can't wait for my little man to grow up and know how and who he got his name from. Ty Moosman left us way to early in life, but i'm glad I could to be apart of his life and his stories will last a lifetime, Dustin wouldn't ever let them die. My family is my fallback. They know how I am when it comes to certain situations. They know that I am a very softhearted, tender soul that just needs that hug every once and a while or that shoulder to lean on. They are always there for me when I need them. My work family-well to say the least, they rock! The support I have there is something that most offices don't have. A bond, a trust, a family love. When I heard first off that Dustin was going to Iraq in 2009 I was completely devastated. I still am, but the words of my co-workers helped me realize I can't change fate. I just have to deal with it as it comes. I can try my best to do what I can to change the fact he's leaving. But if he is meant to go, there really isnt' anything left open as an option. I have a hard time and am really struggling with this reality. Dustin keeps telling me that he knows if he goes overseas he's not coming back alive because he'll be on the front line and so many of his buddies haven't come back and that tears me apart more than anything. the thought that my husband won't see our son grow up. I won't be able to spend the rest of my life with him. How could I not be upset over this and I am trying my damnest to see that he doesn't go. I'm quickly running out of options tho. My life has been rough the last couple years and now that I feel my family and life is in place, someone comes in and messes it all up. Why? To ruin any chance of having a normal future. Where did I change paths? I was top 10% of my high school class, I was 4.0 average in college, graduate of two degrees, Married to the most amazing guy in the world, a wonderful son, a great job. Why does someone want to take that away from me??? Am I mad at the military? the government? myself? I don't know. I wish I had answers and I wish someone would just tell me for sure the final decision. Maybe Dustin will get his exemption for his knee and this will all be over. Does this orthopedic understand what he holds in his hands? Does he know how much of my life and future holds in his hands? I hope he does the right thing. I hope something turns up and this time next week it will all be over but will it ever be???? I'm tired of fighting this battle I seem to always lose. What do I do now? Where do I go from here? I'm exhausted, I'm frustrated, I'm tired, I cry everyday at some point, I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm argumentative, I'm upset. When is this going to end??? Will it ever just end?

i'm posting Ty's Christmas pictures up for ya'll to see. I took these two Saturday's ago.

what an update

Well, its been a month and half since I last wrote.... so sorry but for the family members that read, ya'll did get monthly newsletters instead. So update: here we go....

Little Man will be 6 months on Monday, oh how time flies.... he is growing up in front of my eyes way to fast! I just can't believe it. He has sprouted two baby teeth and he loves to rub his tongue over top of them. new texture i guess. Well Dustin last week got his official call from USMC MOBCOM stating he is officially re-activated as of May 18,2009 for a year tour of duty to Iraq/Afganistan. What are we going to do. As I sit here at 4am on Nov. 28th, I want to cry my heart out thinking this time next year, I will be acting as single mom more than I am already with Dustin working nights. I feel like my life is just going to crumble without him. Without Dustin, life is so hard. I would be able to deal with the situation if we didn't have Ty. I don't know how I am going to handle to situation..... but a lot of people go through it and get home safe.. why do I have a feeling not in my circumstances? Anyway -besides the sad points in my life...

I can't believe Ty is rolling over and laughing.. he has the most precious giggles and laughs and coos... he is starting to make vowel noises and its so awesome.. I can leave work after a terrible day and hear his laugh and know that no matter how my day is, that makes it worth it... knowing someone that tiny makes so much impact on my life is amazing.. Well I better go. Its Friday after Thanksgiving - gotta get that shopping done and then head to work.. urgh! well its not so bad - 1/2 day. So i'll leave ya with some pictures:

We are recalling you to the Marine Corps...

well what a month it has been already and its only October 6th.

September 28th Dustin got a call from US Marine Corps, telling him he has to fly to Kansas City, MO on October 14th to take a recall screening test. This test will determine if he will be re-recruited back into the Marine Corps for another year of active duty. This was very terrifying news and it scares me so bad to think about the fact that my husband will become active duty and be shipped over to Iraq or Afganistan. I don't want this to happen. A year ago i'd probably be able to handle this but with a 4 month old baby, this is where the problem comes in. If he was to go, he'd be gone for a year. A lot of things happen in a baby's first year. Rolling over, crawling, walking, talking... etc. I can't even imagine how our life will be without Dustin at home. I know we will pull through like times before but it's just not fair. Let the guys go over there that are single and WANT to go... not those who settled down finally, have a NEW job, and a new baby and family. I just want to scream "IT'S NOT FAIR" and cry and cry but I know that by crying won't change the fact if he is going or not. The military has no sympathy. I know if I am sad and crying about the situation, it will just make it harder on Dustin when/if he does have to leave because he'd be afraid I won't be able to handle it... Let alone, be able to take care of Ty by myself. I am scared that if he goes overseas, he won't come back or he'll come back a different man than when I saw him last.... My mind just can't process this information. I wish I could control whether he goes or not but I can't and we just have to make do with what we can control. By showing Dustin how much he means to Ty and I and spending as much time together as possible, we will be able to get through this, if that is what is going to happen. Iraq and Afganistan are dangerous places but Dustin already informed me if he does go, he isn't just going to sit on the sidelines.... he's coming back a hero. I don't know how I am supposed to handle this - and lately, to tell the truth, I haven't been handling it well. Although in front of others I think I am faced with being strong and wishful that he won't go... Behind closed doors I do nothing but get upset. In front of Dustin and our families I have to be strong, there isn't anything else to be. Crying when I am alone makes it better to be strong in the public eye about the situation. Is this the right thing to do? Do I sound two-faced about all of this? I just want to show Dustin as well as my family that I will be okay if he does get recalled. I want to show them that I am a strong person and although faced with difficult situations, will be able to get through this. I don't know if this blog makes sense at all or if I am just blabbering on and on, but I feel a little relieved that although noone reads my blog, I have gotten this off my chest. Once again, another day passes that my love grows stronger and deeper for Dustin and without a doubt, he is my best friend.

Well its been quite a while since I last updated. It has been rather busy around the Reiners house. Ty is growing like a little weed. He is starting to be interested in rolling over but can't quite master the idea of one more push of his foot and he'd be there. He rolls from his front to his side really good. Not too much longer and we'll have a roller around here. I can't wait until he has reached his next stage in his life.
Work is going really good. Ashley left on Sept 8 to have her baby, a little boy. I am taking her place at work until she returns in 8 weeks. Work is busy but its a job and it gets food on the table and shelter over our bodies so I shouldn't complain too much.
Dustin starts his new job next Monday, the 29th. He is really excited. It will be good to get away for a while. Away from home, me and Ty... just get away.

Our lives are finally coming together. Coming together quitely nice if I can say so myself. Both of us are employed, we are in our own house, Ty is growing and healthy, I definitely count my blessings everyday for everything God has blessed us with. We never quite realize how great we have it until one day we don't (have it).

Dustin and I's relationship has never been better. Our love is stronger now, and his smile will always make my day better no matter how bad it has been. His arms will always make me feel safer and secure. His kisses always make me feel irresistible. I can't ever imagine having a greater man to marry than Dustin and although I don't tell him as much as I should, when we go to bed at night, I know he knows that I love him and everything will always be okay. You know why? Because "God won't ever give you anything He knows you can't handle".

Well have a good night. I'll leave you with some new pictures and a video of Ty I took last night. Good Night

settling in...

We have officially moved into our new house. With only a few boxes left to unpack it is starting to feel like home. Ty's room is full of animals and he coos at them all the time. Ty has gotten so big over the last couple of weeks. He talks a lot more now and babbles and makes bubbles. He notices more things and he even laughed the other day. I was so excited to tell everyone that he did that. We are working on rolling over now and he will get 1/2 way there and get fussy. Dustin says he has patience like his mother... HA HA HA thats not funny, although he has a good dose of both of us and our attitudes. He has finally gotten over the bilateral ear infections he had and I can safely say with the exception of a couple fussy days, he acts like he feels much better.

Dustin got his job at Bertie Corrections and today he went to do his psychological evaluation in Greenville and after that report comes back from Raleigh he will be all set to start his new job. I am so excited for him and getting this job. He has been so ready to start work again since we've been home. He has been staying home with Ty while I've gone back to work and actually I think it has been really good for him and Ty as well. Dustin has gotten the chance to be with Ty and play with him throughout the day unlike most fathers to newborns. usually it is the dad who goes back to work and misses out on the joy of being home all day with the baby and instead I am at work and Dustin has been at home. It gave them time to bond.

I am so happy that our lives have finally started to come together again. And this time it's for the long run... Right now, my life couldn't get much better than this.

happy baby

I figured now would be a better time than any to introduce ourselves. To the far left of the screen you will see my newborn son, Ty. He is the light of our lives and on that note, the reason I started blogging again. The right picture is our family picture. We enjoy the river therefore taking the family picture at the river was very appropriate. I will upload more later. I hope everyone enjoys. Have a great Tuesday and remember 2 things: Never underestimate the power of God, you never know when someone will be taken away so live life to its fullest and always remember to tell your loved ones you love them. and 2: God will never give you anything He knows you can't handle.